And Then Came the Last Thrifts of May

As is my way, I string you out for weeks on end, promising of great thrift posts (or at least great in my mind)…and then….blammo.

Some lame ass story about how Blogger ate my homework. Well, no more. Blogger has put this nifty little ‘autosave’ feature in. So now…after loading the gajillion pix last night I looked up to see that my wireless connection had dropped and….

what d’ya know? All my pix were still there! Woohoo!! Thanks Blogoogle!

So, yesterday was the last Weds of the month and you regular reader(s) know what that means…

Half Price Wednesdays At Ye Ohio Thrifte Shoppe!!!

Which also means that getting a shopping cart was like getting an old lady to cut you a break on bingo night at the senior center.

But that’s OK. I wasn’t there to shop. I was there to pictate.

The pictures this time are almost in reverse chronological order. And I’m ok with that. And you should be too. Because, usually things strike me funny just as I’m leaving. Unfortunately that also means that this post may get increasingly lame as you read on. Meh. Screw it. I laughed and the is pretty much the whole goal. So, there ya go.

And with that….

Reports say that the new Government Toiletries Department was having trouble picking it’s new scent.

Really, with as pissed off as Mother Nature is with us all at the moment…do you really think it’s wise to taunt her? And last time I checked….hurricane smelled bad. Like death and destruction bad. Mmm. Yes please, I’ll take two.

I don’t care what you say…the new style Dijon mustard is shite. Give me that old style every time!!

This really wasn’t that funny. Just colorful. A little too colorful.

Let me see….Pie plate….broccoli. Oh sure. I see it now.

Ty pie?

Holy crap! I’ve been looking for one of these. A Do it Yourself Radon Gas Kit. Sweeet!!! Skip the middle man, make Radon Gas right in your own home. A great family project!

Heh. So fitting in so many ways.
From the “Geography Of the United States” card…”America is divided into 48 separate regions called ‘states’….”

But I can’t diss too much. After all, it comes with a Proteus. Which…erm…has 2 lights and makes a ‘bloop’ noise when you touch it.


Reluctantly crouched at the starting line….shiny and silver, the bald headed mime…

My neighbor tried to tell me they had a compote patch. They didn’t mention growing anything in it, though.

Oh the cruel, cruel things we do to our young before they’re old enough for therapy.

No Bob, I’m looking for some special crackers. Not some common ones. Jeesh.

The North American Moose candle mates for life. If only I could find two of these…

The autograph says “To Vicki, Best of Luck” what it doesn’t say is “telling your husband where you got the herpes from”

THERE it is!!! Now I have a pair of moose candles!

I’ve heard so much about this book…and now I have my own copy!! And sure, I could have borrowed D-‘s copy, but all the underlining of the good parts would have just distracted me.

I have this in electronic format, but havent’ read it yet. I love these books. Seriously.

There….um…really. I got nothing. Christina as a role model to young girls everywhere.

We’re so screwed.

OMG!!! 3DO. I remember those!! Well. Mostly I do. Actually I remember them being really expensive and getting spanked in sales by the Playstation. So. Yeah.

Rumplestiltskin AND the Naked Butt??? How can you go wrong?

Dude. You’ve been holding out on me!!

I didn’t even know homey could dance.

So…true story… the other day I was driving home thinking of the Jetsons. Then I started thinking of Mr. Spacely (you know “Spacely Sprockets, easy on the pockets”). Yeah. So then I started thinking of the Davy Crockett theme song (you know, “Davy, Davy Crockett, king of the wild frontier). So then I kind of merged the two…”Spacely, Spacely Sprockets, king of the finest gear” And then I ran over the dead racoon in the road.

Wow. Now if only I knew someone that had a Tiki themed room….or outdoor bar,maybe. Hmmm.

I tot I taw a cwappy cwock. I did! I did tee a cwappy cwock!

This is the model you could hack and turn off region encoding (not the little one on top…the big bohemoth on the bottom). AND…if you got board of watching DVDs from anywhere other than North America, you could always plug in a couple of mics and karaoke.

Yes….dragging your bride back by her elbow screams of matrimonial bliss. “No honey, the alter is this way!!”

Clowns scare me. It’s no secret. Drunk clowns about to sit on a scary frickin’ drunk dog scare me even more.

Tee hee. It’s a music thingie…it spins…just like real roofs with real fiddlers spin. And tell me…why is the plural of hoof hooves, but the plural of roof is roofs?
No wonder people hate english.
So…apparently in the 50’s, wedding cake toppers were more a harbinger of doom.

Um. No. There is not enough crack in the world to make this EVER a good idea.

The first thing I thought of when I saw this was the “Wassssuppp?” beer commercials…like you could have it in a shao lin temple.

See. This is more of a happy sculpture. Of course, I don’t know that I’d be happy that my lady, who was smaller than me, is making the bench dip down. There’s some serious junk in that trunk.

My Sister, My CrackFiend.

The painting is entitled “Chico and His Lady Friend” Oh sure. They can name one of the horses Chico, but puss out and can’t name the other one? WTF?

The reward of redundancy is redundancy

Alright all you Photoshop hounds, this one’s for you. Make your own plaque (I originally typed this as ‘plague,’ which while it might be fun to make, I’m not sure you can do that in Photoshop).

One for your bathroom wall…and one for your cube. And has anyone else noticed that they always use the same photo??
Um. This cat kinda looks like maybe he needs to let go.

Slightly Imperfect socks for the Slightly Imperfect Man.

Um. OK?

Not entirely sure what Red Wings have to do with Detroit. Or hockey, for that matter.

“….The world….”

The timeless quality of Members Only.

Yours for only $3.99 ($1.50 yesterday, since it was 1/2 off day). If only it had fit.


OK…is it just me, or does the youngest Hanson boy look like Natalie from the Dixie Chicks?
Theres supposed to be something here, but I’m not sure what it is, so I’ll just put a random “WTF were they thinking?”

WWJD? He’d kick your ass for putting his name on such a stupid shirt. That’s what he’d do. Ya pansy basket.

I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.

Yes…nothing says “Fine Pleasure products for couples” like a white wife-beater.

Yes, safe kids walk like bad 70’s cartoons.

Fabric paint = crap.

Um. I have no idea what the even means.

Yes, because to show our support for native american youth, we should continue to call them Indians.

This is the COOLEST t-shirt EVER!!!!

I love seeing designer T-shirts at the thrift store.

Yes. Yes I do. Which ones do you need?

Yes Dad, u da man. To this day I still have not received a ‘world’s best dad’ shirt or anything of the like. And that’s OK. That’s a lot of pressure. But ‘da man’? I think I could handle that.

DJ Chrissy Chris!


This one had to come home with me.

This one should have, but didn’t fit.

If you look closely you can see a map to where Jimmy Hoffa is buried.
Apparently, the Big Idea was not pink t-shirts.
Even with a hand up his ass, he’s probably still a better choice for President than the guy that’s in there now….who apparently has his whole head up his ass.

Yes, you’re in the hospital…scared…a kid…and what would cheer you up? Why knowing that there are aliens somewhere in the hospital, of course!!

It cracks me up. People bitch about the video games that kids play today. Good thing it wasn’t like that when WE were kids. Gimme a break. The most popular video game of the day involved going in a dark room, eating pills and seeing ghosts.

Not to mention eating mushrooms for ‘enhancement’ in the Mario Bros. games. And yes, this shirt came home with me.

No, Lee. I’m sure the Lynyrd Skynyrd concert is just over the next bluff.

Wow. Um. no.

Some movie tie-ins are just wrong. Sick and wrong.

I’m thinking it’s bad karma when you steal a chair from Habitat for Humanity. And no, you don’t absolve yourself by donating it to the thrift store. That’s just not right. Some previously homeless person doesn’t have a chair to go in their recently built for them house.

Clowns suck.

I saw this first (before the others). And I thought ‘hmm. Souvenirs from France’ And then I saw the rest.

Look. Give us a Million large or you’ll never see the mouse again!

It’s gone TOO far. Hybrid toys. What will they think of next?

Hehehe…This was the first thing I saw when I walked in and all I could think of was ‘it’s a man baby’

And that’s the poop from the world of thrift.

I almost didn’t post it this morning. I was a little traumatized by the dream I had last night. I dreamt I was back in highschool (and at my old locker)…only this time I was actually in the in-crowd. One of the popular kids. And I could see me looking out at me looking in at the popular crowd.

And it was f**kin’ creepy. Maybe being a weiro in school wasn’t so bad after all.

Sure, kind of an odd way to end a thrift post, I know, but it’s just like when you put water down the elevator shaft at Taylor Tower…it killed the static charge buildup…and sometimes you wound up on the right floor…sometimes you were between floors. Never could tell.

Just push the button and hope for the best.

That’s what I usually do.

5 thoughts on “And Then Came the Last Thrifts of May

  1. 1) Yeah… I dug the Brady book. Hell, you might have even been my roomie at OSU when I was reading it since I believe it was released in 1991 or 1992.2) At least Christina Aguilera can sing and, at the moment, doesn\’t appear to be hitting the coke and shaving her head and having a mental break down and wrecking her car and… you see where I\’m going. At least she appears to be past the very trashy Xtina phase.3) Yeah… I the 3DO was supposed to be the bomb in the Nintendo days I think. But yeah.. it got spanked.4) Yes, I have to admit it. My twin brother, Darrin, was a dance instructor. I remember seeing this on MTV and thinking \’ahh crap… i\’ll never hear the end of this.\’ Lucky, no one watches MTV. And I survived… until now. 5) Nice Crocket story.6) You shoulda bought that Apex. The power supply in mine went wacky. If it\’s still there, pick that sumbitch up. As long as the power supply doesn\’t suck, I\’m all over that. (Hopefully it\’s the same model). Maybe I\’ll head there at lunch and see if it\’s still there. Not very likely though.7) Heh heh .. Wasssssssuuuuuuup! The SuperFriends version of that was awesome.8) I think everyone had that Footprints thing up in their bathroom. Why the bathroom, I have no idea. I guess there\’s more time to comtemplate in there. Didn\’t _you_ have one in your bathroom at the apt?9) Heh heh … I had the generic \’members only\’ jacket in high school. Luckily, not many people in my school had them either so once again.. i escaped ridicule.10) Sean John is the suxorz.11) Looks like you gots some killa Ts bro. Hopefully that Mr. T one fit as well. if not, you should have bought it, cut out the iron on and sewed it onto another shirt or your jean jacket. :P12) I\’ve been thinking about joining Habitat for Humanity for a long time. I don\’t know why or why I haven\’t helped out yet. I\’m a big loser.13) I\’m always having dreams about being back in high school and worried that I\’m not going to be able to pass a class or not knowing what my class scheduled is … and at the same time saying \’Why do I have to take these classes? I\’ve already graduated from high school!!!\’. Weirdness. I don\’t want anyone to analyze that stuff.

  2. Kim-Don\’t tell Nash, we bought the tiki clock.DarrinI\’ll check this weekend. I doubt the apex OR Mr T are going to be there, but ya never know. I didn\’t even think to cut it out-D\’Oh (It was a Medium and I was like \’no effin\’ way\’)!And yes, guilty. I, too, had a Footprints thing in the bathroom at the apartment. Not sure where it is now, though.And I frickin\’ HATE high school dreams. Mine is always that I can\’t find my locker…or that I can\’t find my class…or that when I do find my locker, I can\’t remember the combination…then somehow I DO remember it, but the book I need for class isn\’t in it..and I have to go to the guidance office and get my new class schedule…and GAH!!! I wonder if these are all starting back up is because Jen\’s getting ready to go to 8th grade and she\’ll be starting all that soon.And hey….2nd Floor next weekend (the 9th/10th)?

  3. you didn\’t get the \”i earned my wings at joe luis arena\”? c\’mon..really?redwings? it\’s where the play–joe luis arena. just a heads-up!great post!

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